You know, I really enjoy going live on different media platforms. It’s very important for me to connect with you guys and find some kind of inspiration. Your questions and thoughts urge me to write and find new topics for discussion. Undoubtedly, the topic of male and female is the most crucial one to me.
I constantly think about women and men, and how to make both of them happy. My subscribers tend to ask me what to do if a husband suddenly embarks on a spiritual search, becomes religious, or starts to use acid. So… what to do? As the classics tend to claim — understand and forgive.
People meet — get married (as the classics also say), and most often they don’t understand why. The majority does it because everyone around does it too. Ready, not ready? What kind of question is this?! No one is ever ready to start living with a stranger. It is STRESSFUL! For everyone… For him – not to burp, not to fart… For her — finally, he would feel my unshaven legs (yes, hair grows at night), and it is better not to eat at all at night (so as not to fart). Yet, this is half the trouble. It may seem like they have already gotten used to living with each other, and the smell of miasms no longer bothers them, but here something very dreadful occurs — the spiritual growth. And here you are – like a pair of bays on the home stretch. He comes forward with a trash current, and although you slow down, you don’t want to lose and rush into the battle.
We come to this world not to be with someone. We come to this world alone. If the Creator wanted us to be with someone, he would initially put two embryos in a woman’s belly, and a husband and a wife would be born at once. How easy it would be! But it would be so boring! Although now we have fun…You get to choose a partner and begin to love him, both in joy and in sorrow, illness and health, in the stench of old age and young incense…
And… offering each other spiritual growth. He says: “I want to expand my consciousness, so I decided to eat the acid.” She says: “Why do you need it, when everything is already so great, let’s go to Aivazovsky Museum instead,” and he replies: “Nah, not really my thing.” She gets upset. But in vain! Why not accept the fact that at some point you can just become terribly bored of someone. Even of a loved one! Love is not a disco, not a karaoke. Love is a chemical reaction, and in order for the reaction to proceed, you need what??? Chemists, where are you? What does it take for a chemical reaction to occur? At the beginning of a relationship, it occurs spontaneously with the participation of reagents. As time passes, this becomes insufficient, so then catalysts come into play. Irritating factors, you need electricity, you need light… a lot of things.
So what to do when the reagents remain the same, but there are no catalysts? Love begins to die. In fact, it dies if the quality of the reagents does not change. Therefore, one should not blame a man, when he went into a spiritual search. He aims to change himself, and this may be your happiness and a reason for you to think, dear woman. And who am I? What kind of reagent am I? Am I table salt or baking soda? Or am I vinegar?
When living with a person, do not interfere with his life. Give him a chance to take care of his business on his own if he wants to. Ultimately, he would be very grateful to you. You should not ask or demand love from anyone. Why do you need it? Why do you need someone else’s love? Have you ever thought about it? Isn’t self-love enough for you?! Well, if it is not enough, then you should not waste your time taking care of someone else, because —first and foremost — you’ve got to take care of yourself.
© Masha Lopatova